This is not as long as my longest post ever....but it could be fairly close...

"the world is your coconut...now all you have to do is figure out how to break it open..."

Introduction:
Snowbunny Frappechino .... $2.99
Gasoline .... $18.00
Sheet of stamps .... $7.80
Two Jackets ..... $13.00
Two sheets of Valentines' Stickers .... $.99
Leaving a store with only 3 items and ending the day with several lessons learned .... priceless.

Well, my coconut definitely wasn't breaking today. I think it cracked though, but mostly it was just leaking all over me. My day started out pretty good, I got out of bed, though a few minutes later than anticipated, exercised, devoed it up, got ready for the day, made a phone call to cancel a previously scheduled appt, and had some brkfst(I just found a sticker with a picture of teeth on it stuck in my ponytail...2 questions: 1)how long has it been there 2)did anyone see that...that could have been very embarrassing especially when I walk home (in the dark)...who would have seen the teeth in my hair?!), and as I loaded up the car for my excursion into town in my amazingly hot-looking Jeep...no go. The battery was dead...I left the lights on. Boo me. But this is very characteristic (ask family about the cute little LeBaron...covertible, I did add)...so to speed ahead...car got a jump and I headed out, one stop in at the Cfrnc Cntr and off I go...no. Left keys in ignition...battery dead. I laughed at myself in disbelief. Called boss, talked to Bubs...a go. Jeep is running again...boss pulls up, random conversation occurs and he says something along the lines of "you're an adult, you're capable, you can solve your problems." Interesting. Okay...so here's the mental part of the story: when I found out the Jeep died, all I thought was that I made a big mistake, I laughed at myself, but worried what kind of ridicule I brought on myself by making such a mistake, that now everyone will think I am irresponsible. But the boss was very kosher and treated me like an adult. It was weird. Second time the battery died (within an hour, mind you), good to go. Nobody told me it was my fault, that I made a mistake, I asked for help, told them I needed something and voila! There it was and it was good. It was weird. I find that I become childish when I need to express a need or a want, especially if I need help. I don't know if I know what it means to be treated like an adult or how to act like an adult when something like that happens. I knew God had some plan for this craziness today, b/c what I wanted to happen didn't, but something better did. I learned more about myself. (Could it be that b/c certain childhood needs were not met, I revert back to childishness when expressing needs b/c I am trying to fill them now? Or b/c I was seldom treated like an adult when I expressed a need, even in adulthood, so I don't know how to express them any other way? Or perhaps it is a defense mechanism that I learned out of necessity? and if this is true, why?)

Oh, but I posted a quote a while back "If you want something you've never had, you've got to do something you've never done."
Okay, so two questions, obviously rhetorical:
1) what is it that you want that you've never had?
2) what do you need to do that you've never done to obtain the thing you've never had because you've never done what you've never done to obtain what you've never had because you failed in using the correct "method(s)" to obtain it?

I am reading this book, which shall remain nameless b/c it could become a source of personal ridicule, and it's really beneficial, but isn't successfully changing my mind about certain things; and one of the things it suggests I do, very little chance of me doing it unless what my mind has remained unchanged about doesn't actually occur.

I am signed up for classes, five days a week. Two classes on Wednesdays, one class on each of the remaining days, at least until March 31st. Than three days (T-Th) one class on each day.
Which ultimately means to my regret, no Canada. I am extremely saddened, but...whatcha gonna do....when they come for you, bad boys, bad boys....

I am reading Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. I forgot how difficult it is to read, but mostly b/c I try to take it all in. I don't just read books, I live them. I have a very good imagination, sometimes to my disadvantage. I am easily drawn into romanticism, however my logical and realistic capabilities have anchored me in the present and I realize that though what I may be reading about or seeing (moviewise) seems desirable, they do not present the whole picture, which may be why I also thoroughly enjoy history. I want to know the truth!

Okay, so normally I would have written "I love..." instead of "thoroughly enjoyed" but I watched this Nooma video called "Flame" and it talked about the three different kinds of love....names escape me (wasn't in Greek, I think it was the Hebrew words), anyways it was really good. Makes you think about saying things differently, in a different way...etc., etc.

Why do I type smarter than I talk? Maybe I already know.

Oh, I was in the store today and I was going to buy "Seven Brides for Seven Brothers". I had already picked up two jacket things (one for me, one for my sister) and was walking around, I had time, I was willing to browse, not expecting to buy anything but looking for a good deal, y'know. But I saw one DVD left, it was a special edition with interviews, behind the scenes, all that good stuff that almost makes watching to video undesirable b/c you can learn about the ppl instead and I picked it up. $15. That's pretty steep for me (I just bought two brand new books for $.50 each (excluding S&H)). Anyhow, I justified the buy, it was good, there was one left, I've wanted one for awhile....conviction. Brush it off. Walk down the card aisle...."Hey Crystal...." Uh oh. "Hey Crystal" "Uh, yeah?" "Aren't you already buying another "jacket" for yourself?" "Yeah." "Well, do you really need it?" "No. But it's $6, I said that if I remembered to come back and get one I'd be good and you know that's it." "Well that's fine. But what about that DVD?" "It's a good deal. I have a lot of Christmas money, you know. It's all good." "Well, how are you going to learn sacrifice if you're not...ummm...sacrificing? This is money ppl gave you to live on. Are you being a good steward, Crystal? Is buying this DVD going to help expand My Kingdom?" "Probably not. I guess I should put the DVD back."
It was rewarding, the feeling I got, knowing that I was growing just by putting it back. Got in line. Remembered I wanted to look for Power Steering fluid. Distracted. Same convo with some dish towels, Christmas lights, cute plates with snowmen on them that said "Brr!" (they were really tempting), and probably several other things caught my attention, some sheets, a lamp, some pants, a new jacket...well, I just bought the two jackets and...two sheets of Valentines' Day stickers...for my Valentines' Day cards...that I already have...

I really enjoy Valentine's Day. I'm looking forward to it. Not completely sure why, but I think it is my favorite holiday. Though I've never had a b.f. during this holiday, I find it alot of fun and I think I have some of the most fond memories of this holiday than any other. My mom really always tried to make it super fun and special. That and I have a really cute nephew who's turning 4 that day. =)

About the Mom: that post I made about how my mom signs her cards for me "mommy", well, she did that b/c my third sister likes it when she does that and she thought I did too. So my assumption was fairly wrong and the other things I wrote could have been a misinterpretation as well. They probably were, but she stopped writing it on there when I told her about it. I can't tell you how amazing my mother is. This Christmas really helped me feel so much closer to her. I think our relationship has entered a new level and I am really excited to move up. I've been learning a lot and man, it's been really good. I still have kinks to work out, but I know that I can count on my mom and that, to me, is relieving and great. I am not sure what happened but somewhere along the line I realized I can trust her again. That's something I haven't been able to do in awhile and to me, is priceless.