jumbled together, we make one thought, one good day...

So, I'm here and awake. I should be sleeping, so much sleep is needed. I am deprived, yet there's so much to do. So many things to give attention to, yet so many moments to sit in awe and wonder of God and what He has made. My soul is awake tonight, full of ideas and imagery of things that will never be, of things that are not impossible, but just the inner-workings of my mind. Holding it's breath and bending over backwards to make the words fit the context of the page. I am alive tonight in my soul, yet my mind is ready for bed. We had an open skate night the other night. It was ubbergood fun and I have lots of new friends. They seem really nice and cool and I am excited to get to know them better. I had a short convo with one of my friends, who said I would never figure out the mystery that was him and as I pondered that, I thought, "Good. I don't want to figure you out, but I do want to ask you questions and learn about who you are, where you've been, where you're going, etc." Isn't that what life is about, learning about other ppl? I don't want to figure ppl out, I want to know them. I want to share deep conversations, share laughter and those moments that will last forever in the movie clips of my mind. To experience your memories with you, like an amazing run, that leaves you hungry and greedy for more. As I thought about the skate night as well, I was having alot of fun and really trying to get to know some of these new friends of mine. I stood outside myself for a moment and wondered, "Is this the real me? Am I acting naturally? Or am I putting on a show?" We are all actors, they say, on the stage of life. So what stops us from faking emotions, and being ppl we are, and being unreal? I know that there are so many different aspects of each of us, that different situations can bring out who you are. I suppose the only time you really can know the most real part of you is in an unexpected situation. Here's one: There was a littel girl that walked out of the gym during the skate night. She left one of her skates by the entrance/exit doorway and I went to move it, however I looked and she was nowhere to be found. I heard this soft crying in the background but looked at saw no one in the stillness of the dark. I turned aside, but went back, thinking the crying had to be something. I walked through these, what would have been to the little girl, heavy doors and heard her cries. She had panicked, and clutching her one skate was at a standstill between the stares. I turned on the light and saw her cute, tear-stained face and went up to her, climbing the stairs in my skates, thinking, "I hope she's ok." "Now how is this gonna work getting down?" "What if she needs to be carried?" The door that led her to her parents was locked and I could feel her distress. I led her back down the stairs after asking a few questions and reassuring her that she was going to be alright, we'd find her parents and it was all going to be ok. She was lost, she was found, but we were still on a mission. I took her small hand in mine and I "walked" with her through the gym and led her to her father. A minute later I looked up and saw her comfortably settled in her father's arms with a smile on her face obviously enjoying the triumph and security she found there. It was one of the most satisfying moments I've ever had and I wouldn't trade that for anything. I knew she would be alright and she trusted me to lead her to her ultimate goal. In her uncertainty and fear, someone heard her cries and turned on the light and said, "I'm here. You're going to be alright. Take my hand. I know the way."